Wednesday 30 May 2012

An Indian Wedding


 It’s the day after Kabita’s wedding to Subatra and I wanted to record the events factually and without bias so readers can make up their own minds if arranged weddings still have a place in the 21st century. (I don’t think I have succeeded with the bias.)
Orissa, India, is a very proud but poor state in the Indian sub-continent. The Caste system is still strong here and arranged marriages are commonplace. I have been working in Puri, Orissa for 2 months and when I heard that a young girl from the office was getting married I was excited at the chance of being present at a genuine Indian wedding. 2 weeks to ago I even asked her if she was excited about her wedding day and I was surprised to get a blank look as a reply.
Tuesday 29th May arrived, we all had work as usual and I was asked to be back at the office for 7pm where everyone would meet before going onto the venue. I was given a lift by Mishra on the back of his motor bike and we arrived just a few minutes early. Kabita was being made ready by Debismeta and her attendants in a small room at the front of the hotel and I was beckoned in to take a seat.
She really was looking stunning and the detail and labour going into her Sari and makeup was amazing. Her hands and her feet were also finely decorated in henna tattoos and toes and fingers were bejewelled.
I joined my other colleagues outside for more information on the evening’s events: The Groom would arrive at about 11pm and the service would start at midnight, as per the custom of their Caste. I enquired what happened after the ceremony and was informed the couple would leave to go back to his family home and only family members would stay behind. Also none of my colleagues were going to stay for the actual ceremony. Dilemma. Debismeta offered to stay with me if I really wanted to, but we would have to stay until morning, because there was no transport and it wasn’t safe for women to go out in the night.  
Food was available now and I eagerly wanted to see what wedding fare was like: rice, curry (veg and non-veg) dahl and salad, now there’s a surprise! There were plates and we had chairs to sit on, but no spoons. (I became resourceful and used a carrot from the salad as my spoon!)
I returned to see Kabita and found her sobbing her heart out beside her mother and sister. She had not met her betrothed before this day, after the ceremony all ties will be cut with her family and she would stay with her husband forever. Surendra wanted a photo beside her but I declined as she was so visibly distraught!
At about 10pm I could hear drumming in the distance that was gradually getting louder. This was the arrival of the groom – fireworks, music blaring, men dancing, fuelled by alcohol but generally in good spirits.
The groom arrived in a beautifully decorated car and dressed in all his finery.

He was carried to the entrance of the venue where brand new shoes were placed on his decorated feet.
He was then taken into the building to a room above where Kabita was still crying.
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The Grooms party then partook of the food and all seemed well so Debismeta and I went upstairs for photos with the Groom. On the way up we heard shouting and yelling from the garden below and looked out to see that a fight had broken out.
Everyone seemed to be joining in and I decided then I would not stay to see the ceremony. I think Debismeta was relieved. After a few minutes the culprits were evicted and calm was restored.
It was now 11pm and my colleagues were keen to leave. Kabita was with her family to join her in solemn matrimony to a man she had never met before. She is 21years old and her now husband 28. They say 'first comes marriage then comes love', I do so hope so for Kabita and Subrata.
I was pleased to get back to my apartment and that we didn’t stay, although Debismeta would have stayed with me if it had been what I wanted. I couldn’t sleep.
Last September my eldest daughter Christine married James who she has loved since she met him. It was the happiest day of her life, though mixed emotions for me, I was so happy to see her radiant and smiling. I could never imagine telling any of my children who and when they had to marry, but if it’s what you are used to and know, it seems you do carry out your duty even if it breaks your heart.












 

Tuesday 29 May 2012

An interesting week

I shall start where I left off from my last post.


The summer picnic at work last Wednesday was interesting to say the least and to the left is photographic proof that I did help a bit!  It was prepared over an open fire at the back of the Physiotherapy office - take notes David Flint !



The men and guests were served first as per Indian custom, again eaten off palm leaves on the floor and using hands - I was offered a spoon but galantly refused! The cook and host ate last.
 Who still wants an authentic Indian curry when I return??

I think I really have had enough of rice and dahl but the chicken curry and salad was quite good - I saw Madhab throw in loads of chilli but it didn't seem too hot. Maybe I am getting an aquired taste. I just could not eat the rice, dahl and potatoes, just too many carbs. I usually only have fruit at lunch because its so hot so maybe the timing was also off for me.


Cobmitra, the young accounts clerk, is getting married on Tuesday so, as per custom, she brought in special sweet wedding desserts and hand fed 1 to each of us, then put 2 on our plates. It was an interesting mix to say the least - some very sweet syrup around a lump of rubbery tasteless cheese. A delicacy here I am told. Um I think I prefer fruit cake or angel cakes please! Oh and a chocolate fountain!

I spent the rest of the week preparing my presentation to the Rotary Club Puri, as well as a splint:
I was introduced  a week ago to a young 29 year old man who had been diagnosed with leprosy. I had never seen anyone with this condition before and on reading the books I thought it was a purely sensory deficit, whereas Polio was motor deficit. This young man threw me a bit because he presented with bilateral ulna nerve palsy and bilateral foot drop. So some self briefing later: yes, you can have motor nerve lesions with leprosy, but not sensory with polio: take note of differential diagnosis! Fortunately by international legislation medication for leprosy is free for as long as it is required, which is a long time. He is a miller by trade so needs to have fine movements of his hands. After a little and repetitive prompting Madhab got me some webbing and elastic cord and I have made 2 ulna nerve palsy splints so he can try to improve his intrinsic hand function. Now we have to sort out the dropped feet !!! (I spied an inner tube in the store room at the office so watch this space ... lol).
I thought I was here as a CBRW trainer but this variety of work suits me just fine!

We went into the field Saturday morning  to visit the room that had been suggested as our Service Support Centre. Unfortunately there was no water or toilet facilities. Otherwise perfect!  Even had access to a garden area for a playground. The owner is away so again we have to wait......In the immediate area are 2 very handicapped cp children and the parents are keen to do as much as they can. One little girl is 4 and when I first saw her she had no response to stimulus at all. Now the family have taken onboard our advice about exercises, stretches and positioning. She now has some head control and is smiling and following objects with her eyes and head.

Saturday evening I  presented my introductory proposal for a Service Support Centre to the Rotary Club of Puri, Orissa.There were  about 20 people present, only 1 other lady, and we were provided with snacks and coffee in a lovely air-conditioned hotel conference room. It was fortunate I took my own lap top because theirs did not recognise the software I had used for the presentation. After the presentation they asked Madhab 'what do you need?' so it looks promising. Now we have to await their deliberation and wait and see.


My neighbourhood monkey family were in a very adventurous and playful mood on Sunday afternoon. I counted about 10 scampering over this roof, one mother had a tiny baby on her back.





It's now Tuesday evening and I will shortly be getting ready to attend an Indian wedding, a first for me. My camera is charged, outfit ready, lift organised. My next blog will hopefully contain some lovely wedding photos. Bye for now.

Tuesday 22 May 2012

One lump or two?


It been a very eventful and sociable 12 days since I last posted on here. I can even cope with the fact that my Nescafe has turned to lumps despite being in a sealed container - the humidity is unrelenting!

On Saturday 12th May my friend Rosie arrived at 7.30am after a 16 hour trip from Ranchi, Jarkhand. She is an OT also voluteering with an NGO. It was lovely to have the company, loads of girly chat and relaxation. I was very pleased when Rosie managed to find hand embroidered bedding for wedding presents for friends in UK. I seem to learn a lot more about Puri when I have visitors! And of course we had to keep cool in the best way possible - the lovely pool at the Mayfair Hotel. We were joined on the Sunday by Amanda who is a volunteer based in Bhubaneswar.

The start of the working week showed great promise: parallel bars and standing frames all being made to order and even a caliper free of charge from a local carpenter! But the weather got hotter and hotter and the breeze dropped, news came that one child's family had had a bereavement so we could not visit. So the momentum was lost a little but that gave me a chance to plan for June and do some preapartion for more training workshops.

Bidusmeta getting used to her new standing frame
Puja getting to grips with parallel bars

Wednesday was particularly hectic in Puri, I couldn't understand why, until I saw the stage which had been erected: it was the start of the 2012 Folk Festival and just around the Bus Stand (depo) from me! Something I could not resist. I don't usually go out on my own in the dark but I was reassured it was safe as there will be police everywhere. I was also told it would start at 6.30pm, then in a few minutes at 7pm, then oh 7.30 of course! Finally it got underway (7.40pm - India Stretch Time IST) and was a spectacle of sound and colour and dance. I really enjoyed it and went home at 10.30pm smiling all the way!
Exotic Dancers in Puri

The weekend came along very quickly and even though I was working on Saturday I was looking forward a party that had been arranged as a leaving do for some volunteers who's tours of duty have ended. I decided I woud stay at the hotel, which was the other side of town, so I could enjoy the company and some 'refreshment' without having to try to get a rickshaw on my own late at night. The room was cheap enough at RS300/- but OMG the 'bathroom' was disgusting and I thought I felt things crawling on me all night! I did manage some sleep though and it was nice to wake right next to the beach. We had a leisurely breakfast and then 3 of them left to get a bus back to Bhubaneswar. Clarinda decided to stay until her train at 4pm so we went to the pool - at the Mayfair, where else!!!

Work started well this week with a field visit to construct a swing and a pulley for a young boy with left hemiplegia. It's not really like work at all!
A swing for Uttam
We were offered refreshment while at Uttams house so a young man just popped out and :

up about 80 feet to get fresh coconut. I have never seen in real life someone climb a tree with just a rope around his hips and bare feet - truly amazing! I think I am getting used to the sweetness of the 'milk' but not the rubbery texture of the flesh.

The fruit in season at the moment is the mysterious - to me anyway - Jack Fruit. I was interested in finding out how it tasted before buying but no one would cut me a bit so I am still none the wiser. They are huge fruit some the size of at least 4 rugby balls if not more!
Jack fruit for sale in Puri
This evening I was taken to meet the President of Puri Rotary Club, to introduce myself and discuss my proposal for a village based Rehab/community centre. I have now been invited to present my proposal to the 50 or so members of Puri Club on Saturday evening. They will then consider if they can assist with equipment etc. This is actually very good news and means one of the goals of my placement may soon be in the development stages, fingers crossed!

The Office is having its summer gathering tomorrow and I have been invited to assist in making the chicken curry - this will be great fun and amuzing too - they all think an English woman can't cook rice properly (never mind curry), well they obviously never heard of Uncle Bens........ (wish me luck)!!!!!

Friday 11 May 2012

Another day in Puri.

I know I posted only yeaterday but its Friday night and I wanted to share some photos with you. Firstly meet one of my neighbours.
I don't know if the family are feeding him but he has been at this window for the last 2 evenings at the same time each day. I have seen monkeys around here before but not stopping to chat like this!

I have mentioned my work a lot in some of the posts so I thought I would add some pictures to demonstrate more effectively what the conditions and places are like:
  The families have all given verbal consent for these photos to be taken. Above a young boy in a farming community, with left hemiplegia, being encouraged to stretch and use his arm to dress himself. To the left a young girl with quadriplegic spacticity was scared of her special sitter because it was too unstable for her. But she sits confidently on a roll and supported by cushions - this is important in preventing contractures and encouraging better movements. Below a young boy with poor head control shows that he can lift his head when put on his tummy.


There are many other encouraging stories like these which I shall endeavour to keep you all updated with. I don't know how much some will improve, but if we can make their lives more comfortable and easier for their families to manage as they grow up, then something good will have been achieved. Every child is different and has different disabilities and abilities. Sometimes it's the families' expectations and attitudes which are the hinderence to providing the best possible care for the children. This is often the biggest challenge the Community Based Rehabilitation Workers (CBRWs) face when trying to help the child and family. Many parents have had no or little education, the direct translation being 'she can not even see the school verandah'. Educating the family that there is no cure available but better management, and a change in attitude, can help their child better than any homeopathic remedy! There is also often the belief that doing some activities with the child will bring on fits, so the child is sometimes left in a dark room with no stimulation so as to prevent them. Showing the family another way is hard when they are acting on what they have experienced and understand.                                                              
                                                                          
This young girl is practicing head control for rolling by following the sound of a rattle to encourage her to lift her head. Lying on her front is also a good position to stretch stiff joints and muscles.            








There is a lot to do but the CBRWs are dedicated and enthusiastic to learn so I really feel that in just 6 weeks there has been quite good progress. I am nearly a quarter of the way through my 'tour of duty', lets see what the next quarter will bring..........

Thursday 10 May 2012

Still melting!

It's May 10th, and actually a little cooler today. Last night we had the most fantastic thunderstorm, I have never seen an electrical display like it: it looked like fireworks were going off in the sky, there was no rain at first and the air was very still. After about 2 hours of this the wind suddenly took off and rain came lashing down and  there was the most amazing streek lightening flashes!
Photo orage Maurice Danos

(I admit I have cheated with this photo - my camera doesn't have a fast enough shutter speed but this is exactly what the disply was like). The light display was amazing and I felt lovely and cool with the pleasurable thought of a comfortable nights sleep ahead and hopefully a cooler morning. This was all very welcome - except for the now inevitable flood seeping into my living area and bedroom! Either a design fault or I'm just unlucky! At least I don't have mud floors and I do have running water!
I have a friend coming to stay on Saturday night and I am intending to sleep on the floor in the living area so I really hope it doesn't rain on Saturday night! Her name is Rosie and she is an Occupational Therapist working for an NGO in Ranchi, also with disabled children. I am also hoping she can give me some inspiration as regards helping with the learning difficulties some of the children have!

Most of this week has been spent going out into the field with Madhab to assist the CBR workers in assessing and goal/treatment planning. Some of the areas we visited are simply delightful and almost provide an idilic childhood environment and good community support. It was a very rural area and the families were farmers with oxen and chickens scampering around. All the children went to school. An example that being poor doesn't necessarily mean poverty. Another village we visited the next day was quite the opposite - mud floors, mice scampering around where the children ate their food and played, very little light and the children were thin. What they all have in common is 'vulnerablity'. Even here we were offered refreshment - the father had just collected coconuts from a nearby tree and with a deftly dealt blow chopped the top off and offered me fresh coconut to drink! Well, I was brought up in Somerset, UK, where the only coconuts we had were won at the local fair and the fluid inside was white and sour, and the flesh dry. The milk in this coconut was as clear as water and very sweet. Infact so sweet I couldn't finish it, and the flesh was very rubbery, almost like eating raw scallops but sweeter or course!


Today was a quiet day at the office. Madhab's daughter has been taken ill and been admitted to hospital on a saline drip. I did not know this until I was at work and realised my driver was absent! I wish her a speedy recovery and it looks like tomorrow I will be in the office also. This does give me a chance to write the proposals for village community centres for the children and in June I hope we can meet some of the Health Visitors and other members of the support group involved with the children, watch this space..........